a glimpse into my new life

So I'm hoping to get back into this blogging on a daily basis again. Things have settled down around here, we're into a routine, and things are going great.

Like I mentioned in my previous tiny post, the wedding was perfect. I won't forget the moment I walked out with my brother from behind those doors and saw my future husband standing there at the end of the altar. I walked slowly down the aisle (I admit I tripped on my dress and I'm sure everyone noticed, but they were too nice to say anything) and my heart was pounding in my chest...jeez, that feeling was so intense.

You know what happens next, we stand there somewhat awkwardly holding hands, listening to the preacher ramble on about two kinds of love and whatnot, then we say vows, then the whole wedding basically stops while a song is performed for us...amazing performance but it felt like it went on forever, and all I wanted was to be pronounced husband and wife.

Then the time came for THE KISS. I didn't really know what to do...we had talked about how we would do it so as not to make it too passionate, but in the end we just decided to wing it and go with whatever happened. Well anyway, the kiss was perfect and I didn't notice anyone else in the room except for him. Cliche, but very true.
We went downstairs, did the cake and glasses thing, talked with everyone, ate some food, had 298209 pictures taken, then went upstairs for 23810938 more pictures. My face was hurting and I just wanted to get out of there. I didn't get why it was necessary to take 5 shots of the exact same thing over and over again.

We eventually made our way outside after being blown with bubbles, and we climbed up the stairs to find his orange car decorated with toilet paper and random junk from the ceremony. Great. Well anyway, we took a million more pictures and drove off into the sunset.Sort of. I'm not going into detail about anything else that happened that night, but it was amazing. I remember waking up the next morning after only four hours of sleep feeling alive and ready to face anything that came my way. I didn't really feel different, just a little older.

Probably the 2nd most memorable thing about the wedding night was when BJ busted his tail light on a pole in the hotel parking lot. We went to Wal-Mart around 10 to get ice cream, and on the way out of the hotel parking lot he ran into this pole...we both kind of sat there and then got out to inspect the damage. Currently it has red tape over it, just because fixing it isn't really on our priority list right now.

It's hard during the week, especially when I work nights, because I'm alone all day starting at 8am and don't see him until about 10:30 on those nights.

One of my favorite things to do with him is cook. The two of us can make some great meals, and I think we both deserve full privelages to brag just because of how amazing our dinners turn out. We've grilled a few things, and he can make this amazing chicken in the oven. Our first meal together was somewhat of a disaster- we bought a pizza stone and the pizza ended up being completely stuck to the stone, really hard to get off. It tasted okay, it just looked extremely weird and not food-like at all.

We watch a lot of movies. Just last night we made a nest (or as he calls it, a pallet) on the floor, ate popsicles, and watched 17 Again. That still makes us seem like kids, but I think it's things like that that keep marriages fun, new, and exciting. We watched My Bloody Valentine the other night, and we both predicted the whole thing scene-by-scene. He jumped a few times and so did I, but the movie is not scary like everyone says it is.

Now to the thing everyone is wondering about: have we fought yet? Well, yes and no. Mostly no. We are both very stubborn, opinionated, and bossy, and we like things to go our way and no one elses. MOST of the time we get along very well, but then there's something little that happens that ticks both of us off and we both end up stomping off into seperate rooms (for like 5 minutes) to sit and brew in our anger, then we end up coming back into each other's presence and laugh about our little squabble. So no, we haven't had THE fight yet (apparently that doesn't happen for quite a while, but just making it clear) and I don't expect it to be anytime soon. We bicker like little kids and get over it as quickly has it happened.

We usually go to bed around midnight, maybe a little later if we watch a movie. I love sleeping with him. I remember one night last week I was super tired and went to bed around 11, while he stayed up and worked on our satellite dish because it was giving us problems. He ended up falling asleep on the couch (who knows why...?) with a bowl of ice cream and Mountain Dew in front of him. Something made me wake up at about 2am, and I panicked because he wasn't in bed with me. I had this weird thought that maybe I wasn't married, but then came back to reality. I went into the living room and found him snoring on his back. It takes a lot to wake him up, so I stood there shaking him for like five minutes, then told him to come back to our room and sleep there. I think he was just so tired he zonked out wherever he was at the moment; the poor guy had been running on adrenaline for two weeks or so.Overall, life is great and I love it. We bought a fish tank (with fish...) to keep us company, but half the population got eaten by the killer fish in there. Just figured I should throw that in there too...

I'll be back tomorrow. I'm working tonight and have to go get ready :(

~and...what happens after marriage?

I went to the library today because I haven't been in so long, at least six months. I know I haven't been the whole time BJ and I have been together, so who knows when the last time I set foot inside there was. I got this one book called "I Do, I Did, Now What?" by Jenny Lee. It's about what happens after the wedding, after the expensive dress, after the luxury honeymoon (not that I'll have any of those two things, but still. The concept is the same), and how you'll one day wake up to the provocative realization that you are, indeed, someone's wife. Your husband's wife. Your husband's closest female companion, your husband's best friend, your husband's soulmate, go-getter, meal-cooker, bathroom scrubber, sock-matcher, foot-massager...yeah, you get it. How weird would that be? You go to bed single for the last night of your life, then you suddenly wake up with the realization that there's no way out. I know that's a weird way to look at it, but really. Marriage is a commitment for life, sickness and health, til death to you part (or, preferrably, for time and eternity). If you get in a small fight, guess what? No way out. You've made a promise to God, each other, and all other witnesses to always stand beside each other through thick and thin, for better and for worse.

I was also reading somewhere online, that if you can stay married for seven years, you pretty much have a marriage set for the rest of your lives. After seven years, or right at seven years, there's the Seven Year Itch (which is also a Marilyn Monroe movie), which is supposedly said to bring one of the worst fights of a married relationship. Experts say that if a couple can make it past that, then they're in the running for a lifelong marriage.

My thoughts? I don't think it's about a Seven Year Itch at all. I think a majority of people who end up splitting up do not have God as one of the key focuses of their lives and relationships, friendly relationships or a married relationship. Put God first and everything else will fall into place. As of late that's the story of my life, we've been tithing (even though we're barely scraping by with our gas meters on near empty 75% of the time), praying, and going without just so we can fully trust God to provide. And we've been so blessed for it! I feel great knowing we're fully trusting him to provide our every need.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, "One can be defeated, two can conquer, but a cord of three strands cannot be easily broken" (or something along those lines). I came across that verse in a devotional book residing in my mother's bathroom. I liked the verse so much I've decided to use it in this Sunday's Sunday School lesson for my Junior Class. The meaning of it is simple: a relationship needs each other and God to be sure nothing is broken.

What I've learned from Jenny Lee's book so far is this: trivial things are not worth fighting about. Especially in marriage. The author talks about flipping out because her new husband put his mustard covered knife on the clean white dish towel, soon realizing that when her husband came up behind her, wrapped his arms around her, and said he loved her, everything she was mad about before seemed to disipate into thin air. I have a hard time not holding grudges, so that will be something I'll have to work on!

I know we'll have our fair share of disputes, but nothing we argue over will be worth the cost of a marriage down the drain. All we have to do is remember what brought us together in the first place, pick up, and carry on.